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Stop Pretending! 5 Steps to Help You Reveal a Blind Spot

Adventures in Living a Healthy, Juicy Life

Guest Post by Diane from “Fit to the Finish”

We all know what makes us happy and what puts us in a bad mood.  We even know when we’re pretending – tolerating – for the sake of getting along or not making waves.  When I’m tolerating or making myself deal with something, I get physically sick (like colds and flu) or else I injure myself in some way so that “I can’t participate”.  It’s like I’m in a disagreement with myself. I can’t win.

this getting wet business really doesn't work for me

this getting wet business really doesn't work for me

Diane joins ThatGirlisFunny to share 5 steps that helped her successfully reveal (and take action on) a blind spot that kept her hiding out, blaming others and finding excuses for participating fully with her friends and family.

Diane’s story illustrates one of my “51 Must-Know Habits for Staying Young – from the Inside Out”

Stay Young Habit #28:

Stop tolerating people, places and things that don’t fit anymore. Notice how your mood shifts downwards around certain people or situations.

Blind spots. We all have them. Read Diane’s story and then look to see what you’ve been willing to tolerate. Take action! Otherwise, you might end up feeling like this cat. If you don’t like getting wet, stay away from the water.  – Cheryl Ragsdale

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tolerating 150x150 Stop Pretending! 5 Steps to Help You Reveal a Blind SpotLiving Inside of My Blind Spot

For years, I lived a life shrouded in layers. I insulated myself with food, a few friends, and my family. The deeper I buried myself the less truth I was able to see.

I was morbidly obese for ten years. I pulled the curtain down over my goals, my life, and my health. The more I closed myself in, the less I was able to see my true self, and the light that still glimmered within. It wasn’t just my weight that was shutting me inside myself, but also the false self perception that I wasn’t worthy of the effort and attention it would take to shed my layers.

I comforted myself with food even though I knew what I was doing wasn’t good for me. The more isolated I became, the more I ate.  The more I ate the less I moved.  My participation in outside activities diminished.

I blamed other people for not inviting me to be a part of social occasions when in fact it was by my own choice. I rationalized my choices to the point where I felt that others were wrong and I was right.  Wrong Answer

Sometimes though, I was able to briefly glimpse the truth. I’d catch a reflection of myself in the mirror and really see what I had become. I’d volunteer for a community project and have to admit that I was afraid to participate. At times, my weight left me on the sidelines while my family went happily off on a grand adventure.

I was alone.

Thankfully, those moments of clarity happened with enough frequency that I became unable to continue hiding inside my layers. As hard as I tried to stop it, the real me kept bubbling to the surface, only to be squashed by my fear and insecurity.

But finally, I had enough moments of clarity to realize that I could change my life. And I did.

aha moment Stop Pretending! 5 Steps to Help You Reveal a Blind SpotFinally, I allowed those curtains to part completely and looked myself straight in the eye. It wasn’t an easy task to admit that I needed to change and that the only one who could affect that change was me.  But, change I did.

I stopped filling myself with chocolate while sitting on the couch and started making choices that were life affirming to me and to my family. I eventually lost 150 pounds and regained my life.


Here are five things to think about to help you reveal your blind spots:

1. Be honest with yourself. Others may codify you with platitudes. Oftentimes the honesty needs to come from within.

2. Be proactive. Once you part the curtain and look inside yourself find one thing to change.

3. Be brave. Share your blind spot with someone.

4. Remind yourself that you are strong.  Remember a success from the past.

5. Put fear behind you.  Get started!

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Diane

Diane

No matter where you are today, you can be somewhere else tomorrow. Don’t be afraid to part the curtain and look straight at your dreams.  Where are you today? Are there parts of yourself that you’re hiding behind layers of insecurity? Seeing what you need to change can be scary, but the end result is beautiful. That’s living life juicy!

Please share your comments with us!  We love to hear from you.

Diane is the author of a blog entitled, Fit to the Finish.

photo credit: cat, woman, google images, Diane

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Genuine Health Gift Basket Give-Away!

We’re hosting a Give-Away sponsored by Genuine Health featuring healthy products for your inside and your outside.  3 fabulous Gift Baskets valued at $150 each!  For details click here:

The “51 Must-Know Habits for Staying Young – from the Inside Out” Gift Basket Give-Away

Genuine Health will donate 50 cents for every Happy Place posted!

Genuine Health will donate 50 cents for every Happy Place posted!

Genuine Health is a proud sponsor of Sustainable Oceans. For every Happy Place posted , they donate 50 cents to the David Suzuki Foundation in support of healthy fisheries and oceans. Click to post your happy place!

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6 Comments Add Yours ↓

  1. Hayley #
    1

    Great post! Same as Tera, a lot of this rings true with me…. i go through waves of this very regularly. Sometimes I live a very bubbly life, enjoy myself and then even the smallest thing can knock me back down to the young insecure little girl I used to be so long ago. Once I’m there I can find it quite difficult to get myself out. What I have found helps me a great deal, is that i surround myself with very positive people. I am a woman who is very easily influenced by outside people and having those people who can pull me out of the dark places I so easily fall into is a great help. However, despite these people being there, most of the work has to be done by yourself – be honest, be proactive and be brave, exactly as you say. It is a constant daily battle but it makes you a stronger person day by day.
    And good on you for losing so much weight! Last year I also lost a lot of weight (50lbs) and the confidence boost it gave me was unreal, i felt i could be my bubbly happy self again!
    Great read – thanks.

    • 2

      Hello Hayley,
      My goodness! I didn’t realize you’d lost so much weight. I can tell you are disciplined. Once you’ve set your mind to something, you’re going to make it happen. Well done! It’s so important to have positive-minded people around you…especially when you’re not feeling on top of the world. We love seeing you bubbly and happy! :D

    • 3

      Hayley – I think that your idea for surrounding yourself with positive people is very wise. It’s so easy for all of us to be influenced negatively by people who don’t intend to bring us down, but do.

      Congrats on your amazing weight loss!!
      Diane Fit to the Finish´s Last Fabulous Post blog ..Don’t Get Up My ComLuv Profile

  2. 4

    Amazing story! It rings so true to me because I lived that same life. Thank you for sharing, the more we share our own struggles the more of a light we shine to those still sitting in that dark room eating a carton of ice cream. It is possible to change and with encouragement and bravery such as Diane’s, a healthy movement is possible!
    Thank you again to TGIF and Diane!

    • 5

      Hi Tera,
      When each one helps one, the world shines with love. Anything is possible when we allow ourselves to be supported and encouraged. Wonderful to meet you!

    • 6

      Tera – Thank you for your extremely nice words. It is possible to change! Sometimes my hubby will say to me, “I can’t believe you wrote that.” What’s he’s really saying is I can’t believe you were so honest. But just like you said – shining light on things is always positive!

      Have a wonderful day.
      Diane Fit to the Finish´s Last Fabulous Post blog ..Don’t Get Up My ComLuv Profile


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